Tennessee Drifter

Police Dispatcher: Police Department, may I help you?

Caller: Yes, I just came home from work and found that someone had burglarized my house.

Dispatcher: Did they take anything?

Caller: Well, I’ve checked everything and I found that my emergency money is missing $485, it looks like they had a good lunch out of my refrigerator…they also drank five of my beers, and my TV is gone.

Dispatcher: How did they get in?

Caller: They climbed over the back fence, broke open the back door and then went out the front door.

Dispatcher: I’m sorry ma’am, but you do not have a burglary, you have a temporary undocumented resident who is seeking a better life. I’m sending code enforcement to your house to take a look at your fence–it sounds like you are involved in racist activities and will be required to remove that fascist structure.